I don't think we need to know exactly what consciousness is or how to recognize it in order to make a strong case that LLMs don't have it. If someone wants to tell me that LLMs do something we should call reasoning or possess something we should call consciousness or experience themselves as subjects, then I'll be very interested in learning why they're singling out LLMs -- why the same isn't true of every program. LLMs aren't obviously a special, unique case. They run on the same hardware and use the same instruction sets as other programs. If we're going to debate whether they're conscious or capable of reasoning, we need to have the same debate about WinZip.
Technically, any sufficiently self-reflective system could be conscious, it's internal subjective experience might be a lot slower and even a lot different if that reflectivity is on a slower time scale.
In my experience, a lot of people who get into this state start self-sabotaging hard as a way of rejecting what feels, ironically, like losing control. Sudden freedom can feel foreign and lot like your world got forcibly taken away from you. I'm not surprised the author is turning down opportunities and breaking off with his girlfriend. It's a way of taking back control.
When this happened to me, I pivoted hard from getting satisfaction out of what I built to getting satisfaction out of developing people. Now I take great pride out of the careers I've nurtured...a lot more than what I've built, in most ways. I've heard others express similar ideas in different ways, like "I now enjoy making other people rich."
No matter what, I encourage the author to use this time to build connections instead of destroying them (real connections...not work or SF acquaintances). Something I did not read in this essay is how he grew closer to anyone (in fact, I read the opposite). No path out of this valley involves traveling alone.
I think he needs to get closer to himself. I think he's on the right track.