Feeling that I'm not only alone but inadequate to have a life like anybody else.
I'm still alive, so there's that.
Going through tough times sucks, but it's extremely helpful to keep in mind that it will eventually pass.
Stay strong.
In order to be able to land high paying projects as a consultant, you would need to showcase your skills somehow (open source, portfolio, etc...). This can happen later on though and as a start the easiest way would be to ask for referrals and make it known to your network that you're looking for consulting opportunities.
Making this transition though would imply that you'll need to think about it as a business instead of a job, and start cultivating new skills i.e. communication, marketing, sales, etc...
Work wise, I've tried many chairs, which evidently were not all the most ergonomic, but what I noticed was that it's mainly caused by weak core/back muscles.
So I just want to mention that an ergonomic chair wouldn't be a solution by itself if you're in the same situation as me, strengthening your core should be a very important thing to take into account as well.
I could have:
- Picked a better hostel to stay at
- Backed up my data properly to minimize damage if it eventually happens
- Been more wary of other guests (99% of them were cool people but you still need to be aware of who's there with you)
- I used filevault, but forgot to enable find my device
I used all of my savings to go on an extended trip to Asia, the idea being that I'll travel around, work on my own projects, and do some freelancing to cover my expenses.
Things didn't go as planned though, I got robbed in the hostel I was staying at and lost my macbook. Eventually I decided to cut my trip short and go back home where I started freelancing (which I'm still doing currently) and I would say it was one of the best decisions I ever made.
It's been pretty helpful for us moving our analytics queries from mongoDB to clickhouse.