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Feritioyyyyy commented on How to stop being “terminally online”   nights.bearblog.dev/how-t... · Posted by u/memorable
Aromasin · 4 years ago
I'm struggling with this currently. My partner spends 3+ hours a day scrolling Instagram (I know, I checked it in her Apple phone metrics).

When we watch movies, it's me watching it and her scrolling. When we're in the car listening to music, it's just me listening to music and her scrolling. I'm starting to struggle initiating conversations because she's simply not paying attention. Whenever we're out, half her time is spent through the lense of her phone so she can take photos for her story.

She refuses to admit its a problem, disregards any argument I put forward about how it's disrupting her life, and when I really sit down with her and tell her how it makes me feels, she attacks me about the time I spend at my laptop (which I track meticulously and know its at most an hour outside of work, so she is simply using it as a defense).

I've dated girls with drug addictions before, and it was easier than this because they at least admitted it was a problem. I feel like I can't even initiate the first step with her. It's crushing, because besides this issue, she's pretty much perfect.

Feritioyyyyy · 4 years ago
Have you ever thought of making Instagram 'sliw' sometimes?

Might be unethical or it might help her to get away from it?

Perhaps talk to a therapist about how to approach it?

Feritioyyyyy commented on Ask HN: Longevity for your parents, what to do?    · Posted by u/MichaelRazum
Feritioyyyyy · 4 years ago
My suggestion: don't fall for super foods or similar promises.

"Dietary supplement companies have aggressively marketed NMN products claiming those benefits"

No single food is a super food.

And yes the hard things are the things which help not the easy things.

Make sure they have good balance, engaging environment and normal health food.

Something plenty of people gave up on

Feritioyyyyy commented on On Being Rich-ish: Lessons I learned becoming suddenly middle-class   residentcontrarian.com/p/... · Posted by u/embeng4096
samhw · 4 years ago
So what if it’s tremendous[ly] depressing? It’s depressing that basically no animal dies of old age in the wild. It’s still the reality.

Your comment doesn’t really seem to be trying to substantiate your claim, so much as it’s trying to paint a picture of how depressing his description of reality is. From that, I’m pretty confident you’re trying to define some ideal definition of love – which, if he’s correct, would not be ‘wrong’ but would simply not be common in the real world – while he’s trying to factually describe the motivations for human relationships in the real world.

(I’m not sure I quite agree with his gloomy picture, but I don’t think you are even coming at it with the same intent.)

Feritioyyyyy · 4 years ago
He describes his mental image and his current relationship in a way which says 'if I'm poor my wife would leave me'.

In my relationship and in my marriage it's not me who is poor it's us. Or it's us who have money.

And neither of us would leave each other because of money.

And the sentiment his comment convays is at least also not reflected in relationships around me.

Feritioyyyyy commented on On Being Rich-ish: Lessons I learned becoming suddenly middle-class   residentcontrarian.com/p/... · Posted by u/embeng4096
commandlinefan · 4 years ago
I couldn't help but do the same thing when I was reading the article, in the opposite direction: "wait - you had a wife and you were poor?" When I was young and my income was low or nonexistent, it seemed like women could smell the poverty on me and I couldn't even get close to them. It was like trying to sneak up on a grazing gazelle - they'd hear me coming and just sprint to a safe distance. The more money I made, the closer I could get until I finally made enough money that they stayed close enough to talk to.

Even now, married 20 years, the author talks about the burden on his wife and kids if he went back to being poor - I'm sure my wife would just leave if I was genuinely stuck in a poverty cycle with no way of getting out, and I wouldn't really blame her.

Feritioyyyyy · 4 years ago
Oh boy...

My wife wouldn't and no woman in a relationship I know would care about this either.

Love is not based on income.

That sounds tremendous depressing.

A partnership is teamwork not two doing different things.

u/Feritioyyyyy

KarmaCake day5August 5, 2022View Original