There's an incredible amount of ignorance of what has been done before and why things are the way they are, that I encounter continually
When agile-ish processes use up on of those lives every day, that leaves very little slack before recurring customer statusing, actual troubleshooting, or an honest-to-god productive planning meeting wipes the counter out.
I suspect you could waste a lot less time if meetings required agendas distributed beforehand and minutes distributed afterwards, but absolutely no one does that, or would read such material if it was produced.
Having lunch with colleagues has nothing to do with 'backchannel communication'. Sometimes it's nice to hear about where we like to go camping, or what cities are nice to visit in their home countries, or ... nothing to do with work or shipping products.
No matter how 'correctly' you think you're doing things, you still haven't convinced me after over a decade of shipping products that online whiteboards are useful, or refuted any of my other points.
At least we eventually had high-resolution cameras in our smartphones so we could photograph them when people insisted on doing planning on whiteboards - more than once I've seen software architects lose days of work because the janitors were overzealous with their dusting.
Mostly I've gotten burned out because I couldn't bring myself to care and because I was bored.
Doing things correctly would help if you were in the office too, but you can paper over the inefficiencies of doing things incorrectly by wasting more time on the backchannel communication face-to-face.
I do think the "appreciation store" model is a really good one. Allowing each to choose their reward.
There's this very odd strain of infantilization that runs through a lot of corporate office management, like they are trying to reward second-graders with a choice from the prize box if they collect enough gold stars, rather than dealing with fully-grown adults that have their own children.