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Posted by u/skx001 2 months ago
Ask HN: Turned 25, Give Me Your Best Advice for the Next 25 Years?
Hello HN,

I Turned 25! Give me your best life advice!

Don't hold back.

Please share what you have learned over the years in every area of life. Relationships, career, business, health, wealth etc.

I am sure this will be a post to come back to every now and then, so, please include stories, regrets, lessons from your life.

Thank you!

Blackstrat · 2 months ago
Max out your 401K contributions or similar vehicle. Develop good spending habits. Don't try to keep up with those around you. Choose a career that really inspires you - not the most hyped today, or the highest paying. Choose something that gives you satisfaction, even if you make less money than your peers. It will pay off in the end. If you want a family, start thinking about it now. If you're in no hurry, wait until later to settle down and marry. Get your wild days behind you. I didn't settle down until my late 30s. My wife and I are now nearing 35 years. Bottom line, don't do anything now that you'll regret later. And possibly even more importantly, don't fail to do something now that you will regret later. Trust me, the things you didn't do will likely haunt you more than the things you did do. This is looking back from age 70+
DracheZahn · 2 months ago
This is the best advice for long-term security. Take advantage of a ROTH if you can. Regardless of the market or your income, contribute now. Take advantage of the Rule of 72. Double your money every few years. With every raise, add more until you reach your maximum contribution. When you turn 50, raise it to the new maximum. When YOU want to retire, you will have a sizable savings.
wallflower · 2 months ago
Congratulations on your life awareness at age 25! Good luck!

If you have not already done this, in addition to maxing out your 401(k), start a Roth IRA and max it out every single year. I regret not doing this.

Compound interest is everything for most regular people to build net worth. Compound debt is the worst.

As the saying goes, there will be friends for a reason, friends for a season, and friends for a lifetime. Friendships will run their natural course. That being said, do your best to maintain friendships you want to try to keep as you get older.

Don't get stuck in the friend zone. Be bold and ask that person out umambigously.

As many dentists say, floss the teeth that you want to keep. I recommend flossing then Water Pik then brushing with a mechanical toothbrush like an Oral-B.

If you don't know, learn how to cook. There are so many resources out there. While not knowing how to cook might be cute or excusable by a potential partner in your 20s, by your 30s or 40s it is no longer funny and definitely a liability.

Don't sit all day. Even standing desks aren't enough. Do some light calisthenics every hour. Push-ups, wall-sits, squats, knee bends.

Make the time to see friends in-person. We are all hardwired to crave IRL social interaction, even the most introverted of us.

You might want to skim Sahil Bloom's book. While it might not the best at being actionable, it might make you think about the next 25 years in better context.

https://www.the5typesofwealth.com/

Don't give other people advice. They probably don't want it. They don't want you to fix their problems. Shut up and listen instead.

ethbr1 · 2 months ago
> While not knowing how to cook might be cute or excusable by a potential partner in your 20s, by your 30s or 40s it is no longer funny and definitely a liability.

And the generalization of this -- work 'a bit, regularly' towards the big things you want in your 30s during your 20s.

There isn't enough time in the day (or willpower) to overcome 10 years of missed regular practice.

In your 20s, because everyone is somewhat similar, people focus on current state (in a skill, socioeconomically, etc) rather than growth rate.

In your 30s+, you will start to see serious differences in your peers' outcomes as a consequence of that growth rate (and luck / clever risk mitigation). By then it will be too late to start growing.

So identify your goals and start making small amounts of progress towards them daily.

Think of it as the life version of compounding interest. ;)

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skx001 · 2 months ago
> As the saying goes, there will be friends for a reason, friends for a season, and friends for a lifetime. Friendships will run their natural course. That being said, do your best to maintain friendships you want to try to keep as you get older.

I am at point right now where this statement definitely rings true. My generation as a whole is struggling with friendships.

bookwormtrixie · 2 months ago
Happy birthday! I don't know if anybody get back to 2 days old thread, but there is one minor thing that have huge impact on me and me relation with other people, although it touch area that other people wrote about as well.

I put birthday of my friends in calendar, so I remember to call them/exceptionally write them on birthday. I don't hesitate to contact them even if someone forgets about mine birthday and this is the only way so I can keep contact with so many friends when you both are quite busy with everyday duties. I know that this might sound odd and artificial for you at your age, but it is very easy to lose some people with moves or once one of you are busy with newborn children or work.

And little thought about relationship, assuming that you thread it seriously, you and your chosen one should be prepared for the worst than can happen do you two and you need to start practice on small problems, so you can go trough huge problems you may encounter. So I really recommend to work on yourselves or rethinking the relationship if minor problems cause quarrels between you two.

hckr_varnet · 2 months ago
Travel, travel and then travel. Meet people, makes your opinions on how the world works, break them and rebuild. Develop resilience.

I differ from some career advice on what gives you satisfaction which can highly subjective and can bring in elements of regret at some point. So to understand your decision making, expand your mind horizon by reading and seeing more of the world.

Most of all, either learn to manage stress or work on something that doesn't give you continued stress that you can't get out of. Because you matter, at least to yourself and your loved ones.

gofreddygo · 2 months ago
1. dont ask for advice. observe.

2. dont be what others want you to be. be what you want to be.

3. stay away from anything that can kill you or make you poor. especially those that work slowly.

4. backups are a good idea, almost everywhere in life.

5. No doesn't always mean no. Yes doesn't always mean yes. People change. Things change.

6. worst kind of failure is when you try and don't know why you failed. every failure teaches you, learn to learn.

7. copy first. be original second.

8. praise, dont flatter.

9. take risks early. before 35.

10. make someone happy.

QuiEgo · 2 months ago
A friend of mine once said "the warranty expires at 25."

Your body peaks in your late 20s or early 30s. It will get a hell of a lot harder to lose weight, and undo any bad choices you make now the older you get.

Build a sustainable base of eating habits and exercise and *never* let it drop. You don't have to do anything crazy at all, just be consistent. Oh, and use sunscreen.

ramesh31 · 2 months ago
As a man at 25, start to think seriously about settling down with someone if you want a family. Men and women exist on different timelines. While you may think "Oh I'll wait until 30-35 for that stuff", you'll look around at that point and realize you've missed the boat. Of course plenty of people still get married and have kids at that age. But the vast majority of women are either married, engaged, or in long term relationships heading toward marriage by 30, and you won't realize that until it's too late.
veidr · 2 months ago
FWIW, this is the exact opposite of what my most important advice would be. Don't settle down in your 20s. Your life ends as soon as you have kids. You do get a new life, but it's radically different from the life you had, and not really yours.

Also, when you're 35, you will likely have a much better understanding of what really matters to you, and what kind of partner you really want for the long haul.

It's often said that "60 is the new 50" — and it is, if you do it right — the corollary is something like, "25 is the new 19". That's a gift! Take advantage.

ramesh31 · 2 months ago
>Also, when you're 35, you will likely have a much better understanding of what really matters to you, and what kind of partner you really want for the long haul.

Indeed you will, and she'll be married with kids at that point.

>It's often said that "60 is the new 50" — and it is, if you do it right — the corollary is something like, "25 is the new 19". That's a gift! Take advantage.

Again, it certainly can be for men if you're willing to date younger. But human biology has not changed. Women are well aware of the fact that their fertility drops off a cliff starting at 30. Plan accordingly.

skx001 · 2 months ago
Well aware of this and proactively working towards it.

The timelines part is really hits. Many people have told me to wait until 30-35 but the issue is the women that you're interested in are not going to wait for you...

A real dilemma ngl.

treetalker · 2 months ago
My grandfather said:

Stay away from (1) alcohol, (2) gambling, and (3) loose women.

Extrapolate (1) to all harmful substances (including "mild" recreational drugs like marijuana); (2) to anything with a negative expected value (this could summarize the entire list, but includes lottery, sports betting, speculation on crypto, etc.); and (3) to anyone who hasn't established trust or who has a motive to take advantage of others for a quick personal benefit.

Read Taleb re: ancient, "grandmotherly/grandfatherly" wisdom; and heuristics / rules of thumb.

Read Munger re: invert (think through things backward) and avoiding probable misfortune instead of trying to be "happy". (See my granddad's list above.)

If you're male, the truth is that men in the United States still don't have anything close to equal rights when it comes to marriage, family, and especially children and pregnancy/reproduction. Therefore, I would add: always distrust any casual sexual partners (see Rule 3) and get a very good prenuptial agreement (although avoiding marriage altogether may be the optimal strategy for men nowadays).

Lastly, find and develop tight and trusting professional relationships with a competent attorney, a competent accountant, and a competent financial adviser. Use them frequently and take their advice seriously. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

Godspeed.

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