I've been trying to get "social support" through Alberta's online social services for over a month now and I even went so far as to walk 5 hours (round-trip, I have no car/license) to a physical Alberta Works center but I have not received any reason as to why I haven't had any response, email, or really any followup in any form from them despite trying to reach out to them through every means they provide. I also brought up the fact I had security concerns in regards to their systems when I went in person but that was brushed aside/ignored (to be fair, perhaps there's an official way to submit concerns? idk, I've just been very stressed and frustrated as of late). Funnily enough, a few days before I got evicted I received a letter telling me their systems were hacked a month ago and my SIN, DOB, all my personal info was stolen from their systems so now also worrying about my identity being stolen.
CW: trauma dumping, sorry.. I grew up alone for the first 8 years of life with an addict father. I've been diagnosed with PTSD. My mother left me to escape the abuse herself. When she regained custody it was better but she was a foster kid herself. She won't provide me a couch to sleep on + she kicked me out after my episode of psychosis years ago. I've been on my own since. I don't have friends/family I can turn to, some of that is partly my bad choices but I also got a crappy hand in life. I really hope a VC opportunity/job application will work out soon. I wasted lots of $ on a psychologist for 6 years to try to "heal" (now I think 80%? of that "industry" is BS.), was told not to worry about being homeless + turned out that they're into astrology.. + recommended against my decision to stop seeing them after I saw red flags, I made the mistake of listening and wasted more time/money due to loneliness :/ End CW
I'm kind of at my wits end now. I was able to social engineer myself into being a 'visitor' at a hospital for the past week but security got suspicious + said I have to spend more time visiting and less time lounging. I don't know where I'm going to sleep tonight + I'm scared of having my laptop stolen. I'm looking for work in anything now. I know how to program, how to learn/adapt "quickly" (so can most people in this industry I'd guess lol), write ETL pipelines, develop websites from front-to-back, reverse engineer at a 'basic' level, deploy to Linode/AWS/DO/Azure, basic DevOps, Bash scripting, Go, Python, TS/JS, etc. But I have no official degree/certs. I tend to get along with people I talk to IRL but I'm not great at forming long-term IRL relationships except online.Not sure why I'm sharing this with HN, doesnt seem fitting but this is one of the few places I've been able to find like-minded people who think/share cool things on topics I like, I've always struggled to find that IRL :/ Anyways, I'm going to go and try to find/steal some food now, I'll likely not be back online to reply to comments anytime soon. I hope I'll be able to survive tonight/the next few weeks until it warms up :/ I hope none of you screw up/have to go through something like this
Take care, - Krowfooten (a non-public pseudonym - can also email me at -> simplelogin.nxw38@aleeas.com - love to talk tech/can share more about my project in a 'private' place :)
Sorry to hear about your situation.
If you are in Alberta the Bannf Centre will give you board, cheap food and pay for work (cleaning rooms, preparing food, etc).
I know this is not ideal, but being safe and warm is greater than being in the elements in the winter.
So I will say that my information is about 15 years old here... But I hope it helps...
It is really great!
Just don't burden your hosts with the full story :) If you try out this avenue, be positive and talk about all the good things in your life.
And yeah haha, I know how to be positive but thank you for the reminder. part of the reason I'm under a random name is because I needed a place to vent that is more or less not linked to who I am. I do understand how important appearances can be/how what you say can impact how you're perceived.
0. Find someplace warmer and milder. CA coast between Los Angeles and San Diego.
1. Waterproof dry bags for electronics with desiccants. Beware taking cold electronics into warm rooms because that equals condensation, shorts, and/or corrosion.
2. Live in a vehicle, preferably a small RV and somewhere not adverse to vehicle dwelling.
3. Focus on what clients want specifically, not all possible technologies. Sign contracts charging by the project milestone rather than an hourly rate. Deliver without delay. Get an LLC (corporation) because it's cheap and allows large clients to pay you. Don't work for peanuts. $3k/week as an example.
I agree with the contracting advice, but without a decent network of contacts, a track history and reputation, anyone will find it tough to get contract/freelance work. Especially now with so many Americans laid off from tech jobs trying to do the same thing.
There's nothing about an LLC that make it easier for large clients to pay you. Freelancers can work as sole proprietors and get a business bank account. I've freelanced for a long time and never had a problem getting paid, or had to form an LLC or corporation to look more real or get paid. The big problem with getting paid in this case is not having an American Social Security Number for tax reporting (1099). An LLC will allow hiding that problem for a while, but then you can add tax evasion or fraud to the immigration violations.
> I've been looking for a job/contract for 6+ months but last week I was evicted
Suggests your real problem is not finding a job but rather a lack of connection with reality.
> + she kicked me out after my episode of psychosis years ago.
I have a close family member with mental health issues. Your situation is going to make you more exposed for a psychosis episode. I'd focus on getting somewhere to sleep at any cost (any CC to max out?) as soon as possible to avoid getting an episode while you are homeless.
Clearly, I appreciate the concern but I can handle my mental health more or less just fine on my own thank you very much. I spoke to a psychiatrist on the phone days ago before I was evicted due to my own concerns and doubts in regards to my mental health/"conditions". They said they think I'm fine and they apologized for the "welfare" check I went through. Stigmatizing an individual as lacking a connection to reality based on their honesty with their past history/struggles with psychosis doesn't exactly seem very fair, does it? And let's say perhaps you are correct, just as a hypothetical, I am indeed in the throes of a psychotic episode! Oh no, what ever should someone in a position like me do?! I tried going to a 24/7 medical centre when I first got evicted and I claimed I was suicidal and very tempted to jump off a bridge but that was brushed aside and not taken seriously, I so desperately wanted to get "help" from the "healthcare/helping systems" we have in place. I was told I'd be fine and that I seem very intelligent! That's the help you get with our systems... I highly encourage you to do more research in regards to what going through a condition like psychosis is actually like for an individual/the social stigma around such a condition/the implications of such stigma/the long-term effects of anti-psychotic medications, the actual "support" most medical staff commonly provide to someone in a position like that, the number of peer reviewed studies with a sample size that isn't piss poor/etc in regards to conditions like that, the relationship between trauma/PTSD and psychosis, and how shitty of a job our systems are doing at implementing/practicing a bio-psycho-social model of care. I've had to learn *A LOT* on my own to understand what the hell is going on with me, almost no one has provided me with any real and or practical resources. A few days ago my previous "therapist" called a "welfare" check on me after I sent them an email expressing major frustration in regards to the "therapy" I have received over the past 6 years. I swore and said some unkind things towards them because I really am more or less near my breaking point and while none of this is her "fault", I would be far better off if they recognized the limitations of their training and referred me to someone/something who may have been able to provide support/resources to me that would _actually_ help someone in a situation like mine.
> I have a close family member with mental health issues. Your situation is going to make you more exposed for a psychosis episode. I'd focus on getting somewhere to sleep at any cost (any CC to max out?) as soon as possible to avoid getting an episode while you are homeless.
I agree! The longer I go without sleep, the more stress I go through, the more adversity I face, etc -> the more likely that will be to trigger another possible psychotic episode, I've managed to catch about 2 hours of sleep last night/this morning due to staying in a different section of a hospital/waiting room. Before that I was able to get a consistent 6-8 hours of sleep every night in the hospital until a guard "kindly" recommended I spend more time "visiting" and less time "lounging", today (last night?) I was recently woken up by a different security guard while I was catching some sleep in a different section of the hospital lobby (they were much kinder than the last one, credit where credit is due) anyways this nice security guard told me to move to a different waiting room but they also interrupted the little bit of rest/sleep I was trying to get while staying warm! Indeed, what a wonderfully caring "heathcare" system it is we have! Sorry for the tad bit of anger I'm expressing here but I've already maxed out my CC, I'm in a debt, and I REALLY have tried everything I can think of to put myself in a better position, including applying to numerous jobs with my unusual background, tailoring my CV to positions, trying to raise VC for my project (this surprisingly seems to be going better than my job search!), and that's not to say I haven't made mistakes in this process, maybe I could do a better job in regards to selling myself, if so please reach out and feel free to offer me some practical advice in regards to that. But please don't be demeaning in regards to my "connection to reality". I do encourage you to reflect on how difficult it is to find a job in this industry/field when you more or less have very few professional connections, no degree/certs, are a highschool dropout (btw I wish I could go back to school, I regret dropping out, I've always loved learning, lately I've been focusing on chaos/physics/information/quantum physics/graphs/etc and there's nothing more I'd love than to be able to pursue something like this formally now but I haven't been able to find a feasible way to support myself while pursuing that formally when you take into account that I need to survive/pay rent/food/bills/etc, Perhaps I missed something/some resources though, do feel free to provide some practical advice/resources/people I can contact to figure out a pathway to pursue such things :)
Idk,maybe my "tenuous connection to reality" is really the problem! The problem isn't maybe me having a crappy approach to writing a CV (Might be! I've had to teach myself more or less everything in this life) which one could offer practical advice/tips on, the problem isn't maybe my "poor grasp" on programming/practical coding skills/etc (which could be improved on! not to mention it's also possible to provide practical learning resources/skill assessments/feedback on such skills), the problem isn't maybe a piss poor social support system in my province, etc. Nope, it is *most definitely* my "lack of connection with reality." Once again, I apologize for the anger I'm expressing. But please reflect on how you expect your response to be of any use, guidance, or like a pointer towards a real resource, or to be of any actual help for someone in a position like mine. I hope your family member is doing okay and is able to find the support they need, it's just that if I'm being frank, I'm not able to find such things despite trying very hard to do so.
If you haven't already you need to reach out to literally everyone you know. Old colleagues might be able to get you some work. Friends and family might be willing to give you somewhere to stay for a bit.
You're clearly a smart guy. You'll work this out. Just hold in there.