I'll start using one resource and then read about another one that some people prefer for x,y,z reasons. e.g.
Should I do Odin Project or Full Stack Open? Learning web dev sounds neat, but which course is best?
Or, should I work through the MIT OCW or Berkeley courses? Maybe a more comprehensive, official uni curriculum would be better.
or teachyourselfcs.com?
I'm also interested in learning game dev, so should I start with Unity or come back to it after learning more theory?
etc...
I think the hard part is that I want to optimize my time, because I'm working a full-time 50-60hr/wk job, so I don't have a ton of time after work to study, but I'm too ignorant to know what I need to study, and in what order, so I just waffle.
So, people who are self-taught, how did you get past the anxiety of studying the "wrong" thing or that there are big holes your self-guided education?
The way I did it was not to get ahead of the needs of the current project. New computer? Read the manual. New language? Read the manual. New paradigm? Read the manual. No immediate need? Ignore it.
In 65 years the only time I studied something before I needed it was in 1982 when I studied Pascal.
Neither you nor I can anticipate the future. Keep alert and quickly seize opportunities. Don't worry about what you don't have an actual need for.
If you're doing this for fun, well, make it fun. Take it easy on yourself. Just work on side-projects when you have time and energy. No one cares whether you're an expert in something that you just do for fun.
If the goal is more to make a career switch into some kind of IT or computer profession, I can say that I've never encountered anyone who expected me to know everything. We're all grownups and we all understand everyone has different strengths and weaknesses. When we're looking to recruit, we want someone who is helpful and can learn fast, not someone who is already an expert in our whole stack. You'll be more likely to get the job you want from networking than from already being an expert in techs a, b and c. When networking, it's nice to be able to talk about what skills or side-projects you've been working on, but think of these more as ice-breakers than as things which need to be perfect.
To focus on the question about analysis paralysis, try inventing side-projects which align with your goals. Setting a short-term goal will help you figure out what skills you need. If you want to get into game dev, either build a basic game from scratch or start modding existing games, it doesn't matter what. You'll figure out soon enough if you need to learn more theory.
My stack is node and Vue because it’s all JavaScript and Vue feels easier than react.
The real answer is probably that you should pursue whichever subject of CS/programing/tech interests you. If you want a fast, reasonable answer, why not just go the curriculum route? It should serve as a foundation for anything else you may learn.