Some background: I'm 25, finished my undergrad 2 years ago. I went to work for a FANG straight out of college, and also was working on some social networking apps on the side that I started in college.
At some point my apps covered my living expenses and I decided to quit my job because I felt like it was sucking away my youth.
I make enough money every month to pay my bills, and I have a decent amount of savings.
I wake up everyday and want to work on something fulfilling, but don't know where to start. I feel like I have no more purpose in life and am not sure how to spend my time.
I know this is a ridiculous first world problem, but it bothers me a lot. I tried studying math, buying drones, microscopes, and lots of other side hobbies but I need something to wake up to in the morning that keeps me hungry.
I feel like I'm dying slowly and am not sure what to do.
What works for me:
- I went to great lengths to reduce my computer time, and particularly mindless scrolling. I am also careful with video games and other time killers. These are fast food for the mind.
- I reintroduced idle time. I leave the internet out of the bedroom and enjoy quiet breakfasts on the balcony. This is where ideas take hold.
- I cook, I garden, I fix cars, I build stuff, I draw. Active or participative hobbies are absolutely essential. You gotta mold your world, not merely pass through it like a ghost.
- I explore a lot. I've explored most of my area on a bicycle, and most of Europe on a motorcycle. There's an endless world I've seen none percent of. I never regretted exploring more of it.
- I really sweat the small stuff. I try to make the ordinary things matter, and to appreciate the little rituals. I like fresh flowers, candlelight reading, tea time, sunset beer, bicycle picnics, fancy breakfasts and many other things. These are a good outlet for all your spare time.
I guess I'm answering my own question, we just need to distract ourselves and have fun/find fulfillment so long as we're capable of experiencing things (i.e. as long as our brains can be stimulated, which will end when we die).
You'll die regardless of what you do. You might as well enjoy the ride.
Dead Comment
I never thought I’d go down the music path seriously but now it’s the only thing I can generate a sense of purpose from and I am enjoying it. Music is the perfect universal thing to unify all abstractions in life in a common core. It seems the ancients had this knowledge but over the years learning music became less and less mandatory and or important.
Music, I’ve come to learn, _is_ the universal language between all things and connects to everything in a very real way to such an extent it can show the relation between abstract models in a tangible way because it’s the bridge between realities. For instance color, geometry, frequency, scales, and ratios/celestial orbits. They all integrate (have in common with music).
Sentience etymologically is a Being which feels; to feel is to aware of vibrations from frequencies, music is the experience of integrating all the senses into one.
Just my thoughts and experience. Feel free to ignore.
* Music production on the PC can be really cheap, almost for free, but it can be really overwhelming and hard to figure out where to start.
* The hardware synth (dawless) route can be a deep rabbit hole leading to GAS (gear aquisition syndrome). Resist.
* Music is more about intervals, the distances between notes, than about the notes themselves. Let this sink in.
* If I were to only buy one piece of gear at all, I'd buy the Synthstrom Deluge. Really immediate, easy to get into and still deep and powerful. This the device you want.
* If the Deluge is out of your budget, get a used Novation Circuit on Craigslist.
* The limitations hardware synths have, can be a challenge sparking creativity. Embrace the limitations.
* Layers.
* Don't fill up all the space. Deliberately leave some room.
* Record everything.
* There are no wrong notes. There is only tension and release. Tension can be good. It is interesting. Learn to build tension and how to release it. Practice.
* Don't overthink it. Practice. Better to knock out a bunch of shitty or mediocre tracks than thinking about that one smash hit you never make.
* Modular is a money grave. VCVRack is for free. Omri Cohen is your best friend in this realm. Bespoke synth gives you even more freedom.
* Music theory is helpful if you understand that it is only a lighthouse. You can still go whereever you want.
* Start here if you are a computer nerd: https://eev.ee/blog/2016/09/15/music-theory-for-nerds/
* Start here if you are afraid of Music theory: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoeHDN2FVTc
If you want to make an impact, nothing beats working with other people. Managing teams, starting a company with others, doing hobbies together.
Working with a team to solve a boring problem together can be more fulfilling than working alone to solve a complex problem. Don’t underestimate the value of the social component.
I found networking surprisingly beneficial, even as an introvert. I ended up creating a network of informal business relationships where no money is exchanged, just leads and useful advice. We occasionally meet over drinks to talk shop.
You gotta keep looking around — without desperation, but with curiosity. Charity, chess, spying for New Zealand, exploring nudism and Rust — until you've tried everything it's too early to feel bored.
I'm clinically depressed / adhd, slowly finishing up my savings, and not sure if I'll be able to recover and start earning and enjoying life. Started posing at HN to not lose the ability to speak.
Don't be me. It starts with small things, and then entraps.
Socialize with positive people, care about your body, run like Phoebe from 'Friends', and never ever allow anyone — including yourself — to doubt you. Fuck everybody¹, enjoy everything.
———
¹ Metaphorically speaking.
Dead Comment
Almost nobody else knows what to do with their lives, either.
The keys seem to be:
- Anchor your happiness to things internal to you, and not the environment.
- No matter what successes you reach, there will always be ups and downs. Those are natural.
- Career and goal-wise: if stuck, just pick something and tend toward making small iterative improvements to whatever you’ve got going.
Me? I knew I was going to end up in jail pretty early in life, so I joined the military at 18, and got into an excellent technical job.
I still run into periods where I supposedly don’t know what I’m doing, but I recognize it’s normal and don’t worry too much and it passes.
Then, like many have commented already, it always helps to find a group of people to talk to and to do so some activities with them. It doesn't have to be an ongoing everyday intensive meetups, chatting, and activities. But finding people with whom you have common interests does help a lot in sparking ideas, inspiring you to figure new things out, challenging you to get out of your comfort zone, and eventually to figure know yourself better and what you like to do.
When I was in your situation, I was already on twitter, and my behavior reflected in a way where I was constantly picking fights with everyone. When I took a step back, and did some introspection, I noticed that I was being unnecessarily aggressive because I was frustrated.
So I changed the way I used twitter, and this helped me meet like minded people, some of whom I got the chance to meet in person, and many others with whom I connected virtually.
The opportunities are endless, and it doesn't have to be an in-person group. All it takes is to find what your interests are, and to look for other nice people who share the same interests as you. With time you'll grow, learn new things, and feel more satisfied. Hope this helps. Mucho ánimo.
> I tried studying math, buying drones, microscopes, and lots of other side hobbies
I am not sure what else you've tried, but these are all technocratic activities. Try something that quite literally grounds you. I would suggest things along the lines of gardening (your own garden or as a volunteer) or volunteering at Habitat for Humanity or other volunteer opportunities or martial arts. Humans are not evolved to be surrounded by and inundated with modern technology. We are evolved to move, touch dirt, and use our mind, body, and senses as one. Find something that connects you with other people, where they may even depend on you, and also connects you with the ground and nature. Many places need volunteers for a variety of work, which can often be fulfilling and create situations where people depend on you, which will help create drive.
As someone who deeply struggles with the philosophical questions that arise out of living in this world, I find it is best not to dwell on things like purpose. Out of all the questions we have about the universe, how would "answers" even help? If someone were able to tell you your purpose, if such a thing could exist, how would it affect you or change things? A good thing to learn is being content. You are this being in this world, nothing more and nothing less, and so the best way to live your life is to live it and stop thinking about living it.